Every time I find myself stuck on a customer service call waiting for a human to answer, I know exactly what to expect because I've heard the standard issue script a thousand times before. You know the one. It starts with a perfunctory "Your call is important to us," followed by a series of pre-written empathy statements that feel about as warm as a walk-in freezer. It's not just the phone lines, either. These scripts are everywhere—in our emails, our LinkedIn DMs, and even in those awkward "how's the weather" conversations we have at the grocery store. We've become so reliant on these pre-packaged ways of communicating that sometimes it feels like we've forgotten how to just be, well, people.
The thing about a standard issue script is that it's safe. It's a shield. Companies use them because they want consistency and they want to minimize the risk of someone saying something "off-brand." But the irony is that by trying to be perfectly professional, they often end up sounding perfectly robotic. When someone reads from a script, you can hear the lack of stakes in their voice. There's no room for a real moment of connection because the path is already paved, and there are no exits allowed.
The Corporate Filter and the "Professional" Voice
If you've ever worked in an office, you've probably mastered your own version of the standard issue script. It's that weird, stilted way of writing that only exists in the world of CC'd managers and "as per my last email." We start our messages with "I hope this finds you well" even if we haven't thought about that person's well-being for a single second. We use words like "synergy," "alignment," and "deliverables" because they sound like the things a productive person says.
But have you ever stopped to think about how much time we waste translating our actual thoughts into this corporate dialect? Instead of saying, "Hey, I'm stuck on this project, can you help?" we write a three-paragraph essay that basically says the same thing but hides the vulnerability behind a wall of jargon. We're so afraid of looking unprofessional that we default to the script, even when the script is actively making our lives harder. It's a performance, and honestly, it's an exhausting one.
Why We Cling to the Familiar
It's easy to poke fun at these scripts, but they exist for a reason. They provide a sense of security. When you're following a standard issue script, you don't have to worry about saying the wrong thing. You're following the rules. For a new employee at a call center, that script is a lifeline. It tells them exactly how to handle a disgruntled customer without having to panic.
Socially, we do the same thing. The "Hi, how are you?" / "I'm good, you?" exchange is the ultimate social script. It's the grease that keeps the wheels of society turning without us having to actually get vulnerable with the guy making our coffee. We don't actually want to tell him about our existential dread at 8:00 AM, and he probably doesn't want to hear it. So, we stick to the script. It's efficient, but it's hollow.
The Death of Creativity in Media
You see the standard issue script play out in Hollywood all the time, too. Have you ever watched a movie and realized you could predict every single line of dialogue before the actors even opened their mouths? There's the "We're not so different, you and I" villain speech. There's the "It's not what it looks like!" misunderstanding that drives the plot of every rom-com. There's the "In English, please?" whenever a scientist explains something slightly complex.
When writers lean too heavily on these tropes, the story loses its soul. It starts to feel like it was assembled in a factory rather than created by a human mind. We crave stories that surprise us, but the industry often falls back on what worked last time. It's the safe bet. But "safe" is usually just another word for boring. When a movie actually breaks the script—when it ignores the expected beats and does something weird or messy—that's when we actually sit up and pay attention.
Digital Echo Chambers and Social Media
Social media has its own version of the standard issue script, and it might be the most pervasive one yet. Think about the way people comment on Instagram or TikTok. "So proud of you!" "Obsessed with this!" "Goals!" It's like we've developed a shorthand for human interaction that requires zero thought.
Even the way people "apologize" online follows a very specific template. The "I've been doing a lot of listening and learning" post is so common now that it's basically become a meme. It doesn't matter what the situation is; the script remains the same. It's a way to perform accountability without necessarily having to do the hard work of actual change. We've traded genuine expression for a set of phrases that we know will get the right "likes" or avoid the right "cancellations."
The Cost of Being "On Script"
The real danger of living life by a standard issue script is that we lose our edge. We lose the things that make us unique. If everyone is saying the same things in the same way, then eventually, we all just blend into a beige background.
In a world that's increasingly being filled with AI-generated content (ironic, I know), the things that are going to matter most are the things that don't feel scripted. The moments where someone goes off-script—the stutter, the weird joke, the unexpected honesty—are the moments where we actually connect. People can sniff out a script from a mile away. We've become hyper-aware of when we're being "sold" something or when someone is just going through the motions.
How to Ditch the Script
So, how do we stop? It's not about being a rebel for the sake of it. It's just about being a little more present. Instead of sending that "I hope you're having a great week" email, maybe try saying something specific about why you're reaching out. Instead of the standard "How are you?" try asking someone "What's the best thing that happened to you today?" or even just "What are you working on lately?"
It feels clunky at first. Ditching the standard issue script means you have to actually think about what you're saying. It means there's a chance you might say something awkward or get a weird look. But it also means you're actually there.
Real Talk in a Scripted World
I think we're all a little starved for authenticity. We're tired of the polished, the pre-approved, and the perfectly curated. We want the rough edges. We want the person on the other end of the phone to sound like they actually have a pulse.
Next time you find yourself about to use a canned phrase or a predictable response, try to pause for a second. Ask yourself if you're saying it because you mean it, or because it's the standard issue script you've been taught to follow. You might find that once you stop following the lines, the conversation gets a lot more interesting. It's definitely more work, but the payoff is that you might actually feel like a human being again, rather than just another cog in the giant machine of "professionalism."
In the end, the script is just a safety net. And while safety nets are great for when you're learning to walk, eventually, you've got to let go of them if you ever want to run. So, go ahead. Say something weird. Be a little too honest. Break the pattern. It's much more fun on the other side.